I’VE often warned against tempting fate. When you have a relationship and are getting on fairly comfortably with your partner, it’s almost fatal to the relationship to bring in a third party to live with you under any guise. That is why, no matter how repulsive we find it, male domestics continue to dip into the same pots as their masters and male partners throw caution to the wind and pant after the maids!
When Musibau came back from the US years back, the first person he got in touch with was Gboye, his friend of several years. I’d known them together even before they travelled abroad and when Musibau called that Gboye was throwing a welcome party for him, I gladly attended. Gboye’s wife, Rita, and the mother of their three children, was the perfect hostess, she seemed to get on with Musibau, who she hadn’t met until his return.
When I asked Musibau what his plans were and where he was staying, Gboye cut in: “The silly man went to stay in the family home until his wife joins him with their children. I’ve told him it was a silly thing to do. The place is a bit dilapidated and crowded. First thing tomorrow, I’m moving him into the guest room. It would be a temporary arrangement. His wife is expected in a couple of months, and, until she arrives, he has a home with us.”
Rita beamed her approval and, when I cornered Musibau later on and asked him of the rationale behind his moving in with a married couple, he saw no problems at all. “You don’t understand,” he tried to assure me, “Gboye is not only my best mate, he’s like a blood brother. We went back a long way and we’d shared a lot of things in the past. We even lived together once with our girlfriends. No problem at all,” I shrugged. Who was I to put a spanner in any works? Musibau eventually moved in, and I’d seen him with his hosts at parties and they seemed to get on well.
Too well, if you’d asked me. When next I saw Musibau, it was at one of these fancy malls on the Island and he looked as if he was dying for a chat. “Why did you warn me against living with Gboye at my welcome party?”, he asked. Well, why did he want to know now? “I think Rita has the hots for me!” he said, not at all bragging. “My friend has turned into a home body but Rita is the swinging type.
Whenever Gboye refuses to go on an outing with her, she suggests taking me and Gboye instantly agrees. A couple of weeks ago, I was watching the TV late in the night when she joined me on the sofa. She couldn’t sleep, she said, and when the film got really steamy, she placed her hand on my thigh. ‘Do you like me at all?’ she asked. ‘Gboye is my best friend’, I reminded her. She simply got up, said good night with a full kiss on my lips!
I gulped but she’d disappeared to the bedroom. From then on, she gave me knowing looks, even when her husband was around. I became nervous. Rita is an extremely pretty woman but I have my pick of female friends. Only I dare not bring them home because of my friend—he’s a married man after all. I can’t wait for my wife to come back in a month’s time—she’ll save me from making a fool of myself. I shook my head sadly.
Trying to stop a scheming woman, I warned, was like trying to stop a charging vehicle with one hand. My warning came too late. I’d heard Musibau ‘s wife was back and I heaved a sigh of relief. At least, now, Rita would check her randy libido. “She’d already seduced me by the time my wife arrived”, Musibau told me sadly weeks later when he came visiting. “You’re the only one I can confide in.
My Waterloo came the day Gboye had to travel to Abuja officially for a couple of weeks. As soon as he left, Rita virtually lunged at me. That night, she kissed me full on the lips again and I responded. She’d sent too much signal for me to remember any friendship that existed between Gboye and I. Soon we were at it, brushing the sheets off their bed. She felt really triumphant and for the next two weeks, she couldn’t keep her hands off me. I felt guilty, of course.
Luckily, when Gboye came back, we acted normal and he didn’t suspect a thing. Having gotten away with it, we grew more adventurous. We’d even had sex up against the sitting room door while Gboye slept. That way, if he tried to come in, we’d know about it first.
“But my wife smelt a rat as soon as she came back with our son. She hated Rita on sight and pointed to the fact that she was too familiar with me. She immediately arranged for us to move in with her parents. I’d earlier turned up my nose at living with my in-laws, but she threatened to tell Gboye if I refused to come with her. To be frank, I was enjoying the attention of two women but I love my wife too much to jeopardize my marriage.
So, we left our hosts and I had some peace of mind. When we eventually found a four-bedroom flat and had a house-warming, Rita brought bowls of food that my wife wanted to dump in the bin. I had to plead with her not to because of Musibau, the innocent one out of the nightmare. I thought I’d seen the end of my affair with Rita until the day she called and I told her my wife was with her parents because her aunt died.
I was shocked to discover her at my door minutes after her phone call. When I let her in, puzzled, she started clawing at me, wanting sex. That was when I told her enough was enough. That I couldn’t make love to her in my own home with photos of my family staring at me from all corners of the room. She did not understand at all. If I could make love to her in her matrimonial home, why couldn’t we do the same in mine? I told her to beat it. She was so furious I was apprehensive she might do something rash.
“ A few days later, I was relaxing with a bottle of beer in front of the TV when my mobile bleeped a message: ‘Is it true you’re sleeping with Rita?’ It was from Gboye. I was still deciding on what to say when he drove up— we live a few minute’s drive from each other. He looked really ragged as he came in. ‘How could you?’, he howled, ‘my best friend?, after all I did for you?’
“He plunked himself on the nearest chair, his head in his hand and he was sobbing. I’d never seen him this unhappy before. Of course, I denied everything. Who did he think I was to sleep with a friend who’d meant so much to me? Did he realize that even my wife suspected the same thing and insisted we should all stop being so friendly.
Where did he hear of such nonsense? He then showed me a message on his mobile. I went cold as I read it:”If your wife hasn’t told you she’s sleeping with your best friend, then you ought to know: the sender had no name. A mischief maker? My wife”? Relieved that it wasn’t Rita that went confessing to her husband,’ I told him to forget the message. Had he confronted Rita? I asked him.
He said he had. That Rita was so indignant she insisted he came to me for reassurance. She even wanted to come with her husband to show how innocent she was but Gboye declined. “Phew! To be let off the hook that easily. Gboye told me he loved his wife and children and wouldn’t want his home to break. I assured him I would be the last person to do so. Didn’t I also have a family I cared so much about?
That sort of convinced him and I offered him a drink. I was hoping he would refuse. The state he was in, I didn’t want my wife to meet him in the house. But, he took up my offer. When my wife came in, she went to the kitchen and I pleaded with Gboye not to complicate things by telling her, that we must salvage what was left of the friendship we shared, and, to my relief, he agreed.
“If only I’d listened to you when you warned me I shouldn’t stay with Gboye. You know, even now when we run into each other, Rita still smirks? That girl is shameless. All I know now is that she’s a nymphomaniac. If it wasn’t me. It would be the next man. Only heavens know who she’s currently luring into her loins…”